Stubborn as a …

Closeup shot of two donkeys on a farm

I was going to post an actual newsletter next instead of ‘just’ another blog, but the thought of learning how to replicate my last one as well as writing three articles instead of one has been keeping me from tackling this task. I was swimming this morning when my mind switched this up for me: I can post a blog instead if I want to.

And why not? Isn’t this my website? Isn’t this my author career I’m trying to launch? Aren’t I the one making the timeline? It’s true that I can’t wait to have several books of my own on the shelf as well as a healthy fan base, but it doesn’t mean that I have to tackle ‘all the things’ at once to get there. Instead, I’m doing my best at telling myself, well, that I’m doing my best.

Writing wasn’t something I decided to do one day, it was something that I answered the call for. Stories have always been playing in my head, and I finally started typing them out. In learning about the indie author trade I’ve heard other authors list the pros of being your own manager and decider of everything from the words you write to the cover art that you choose. On the flip side, the cons are that you are the only one who makes the decisions! 

Sure, I can bounce ideas off of family, friends, and co-workers, but ultimately it’s me building this dream one brick at a time.

In going through the steps of publishing my first book, I’m learning a lot about myself, but one thing in particular: I’m stubborn when I want something to be done my way. 

Gasp! 

Did I really just admit this? I’m can see my husband doing a fist-pump in celebration.

I remember when I started my journey over a year ago I said something like, “I don’t want to painfully go through every sentence and dissect every single word! That would take forever!”

Stubbornness thankfully lost this battle when I came to my wits and realized that if I wanted a good manuscript, I would have to spend a great deal of time editing.

When it came to my logo, however, I knew I didn’t want to settle until I was truly happy with the finished product. Holding out on this, I found, was worth it because I now have a logo that I’m proud to have represent my brand.

And then we come full circle to this blog. I want to have a regular newsletter, but since it was holding me back from actually publishing a post, I decided to take the easier route.

This, I discovered, is my prerogative. (Does anyone else have that song go through your head when you see this unfrequented word?). 

If I want a different cover, that’s my choice. If I don’t want to send my book to beta readers or have it on preorder status for three months before my launch, I don’t have to. Regardless of whether or not these are good decisions, this is the beauty of being the one in control. I can switch anything I want up as I get a better understanding of everything!

Do you have anything like this in your life? Maybe it’s a hobby that you love or things you feel like you have to do. Maybe take a second to filter through some of the things that are causing you anxiety or even a little bit of angst and ask yourself: is this something I really have to do? If so, is there a workaround to make it easier?

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